I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Randomize