Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
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