She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
