Texts From Last Night

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  (810): View more from Michigan

  I must be too annoying 4 u.

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  (810): I must be too annoying 4 u. http://tfl.nu/bqrs
  Replies (7) Good night (747) Bad night (2318) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall

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  (919): I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall http://tfl.nu/tdv6
  Replies (17) Good night (3370) Bad night (1348) Order T-Shirt
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.

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  (651): I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old. http://tfl.nu/njv7
  Replies (13) Good night (5367) Bad night (1774) Order T-Shirt
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.

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  (734): Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands. http://tfl.nu/f2kb
  Replies (12) Good night (3779) Bad night (748) Order T-Shirt
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?

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  (248): Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower? http://tfl.nu/qrst
  Replies (5) Good night (883) Bad night (2045) Order T-Shirt
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"

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  (603): My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage" http://tfl.nu/888s
  Replies (2) Good night (1699) Bad night (516)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents

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  (206): he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents http://tfl.nu/f104
  Replies (48) Good night (1088) Bad night (3161) Order T-Shirt
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  (352): View more from Florida

  I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.

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  (352): I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle. http://tfl.nu/6oed
  Replies (15) Good night (3133) Bad night (521) Order T-Shirt
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants

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  (417): Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants http://tfl.nu/tk01
  Replies (1) Good night (729) Bad night (360) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.

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  (303): Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs. http://tfl.nu/8ywt
  Replies (5) Good night (433) Bad night (851) Order T-Shirt
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  (863): View more from Florida

  Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.

  (813): View more from Florida

  You always make things weird.

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  (863): Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower. (813): You always make things weird. http://tfl.nu/1vvg
  Replies (6) Good night (879) Bad night (187)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.

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  (803): the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this. http://tfl.nu/qdyt
  Replies (0) Good night (446) Bad night (213) Order T-Shirt
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus

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  (708): it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus http://tfl.nu/ryiv
  Replies (3) Good night (702) Bad night (172)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you

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  (502): I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you http://tfl.nu/6iu1
  Replies (3) Good night (675) Bad night (144) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.

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  (847): My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital. http://tfl.nu/g98t
  Replies (3) Good night (829) Bad night (157) Order T-Shirt

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