help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
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How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
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She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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