I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
We need to get me chipped asap
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
