As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
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