oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize