Whod you bang
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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