I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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