I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize