WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
23 Gruesome Scientific Facts That Will Make You Squirm
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences In Dating Men And Women
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I have aggressive nipples.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment