oh god the rape fog is back!
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
