Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
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