you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
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