i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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