It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
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my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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