im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!