I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize