You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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