I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize