So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Randomize