If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
