She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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