A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
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