Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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