Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
