try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize