Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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