I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
