All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
