no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Randomize
