My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.