Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
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