You're my little dorito
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
