Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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