More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize