There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
