get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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