Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
this beer tastes like vomit already
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Randomize