We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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