You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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