she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
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I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
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How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.