so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
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