Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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