omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Randomize