I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize