You can't special order awesome
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.