We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize