Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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